EXCERPT by Kent Christen
March 17, 2010 Short stories Tags: military
Noon, The Next Day, I-35, North of Emporia, Kansas
We tend to drive slowly when we’re traveling with the kids. As they’ve gotten older, traveling has gotten easier, but we still take our time driving. Besides, it wasn’t like we were in a hurry. We stopped for the night in Wichita, just off the Kansas Turnpike. The match had ended at about 2:30 in the afternoon, so we drove for a few hours and pulled into a Holiday Inn to get a good night’s sleep.
We woke up at about 8 a.m. Well, my wife and kids did. I woke up at about 6:30 and went for a short run. Old habits die hard, you know? We had a somewhat leisurely breakfast and got on the road. We decided to wait to stop for gas in Emporia, hoping the price had held over the weekend. It was about five cents cheaper. Since I hadn’t started drawing a paycheck from my teaching gig yet, every little bit helped.
I was pumping gas and my wife and kids were getting in a bathroom break and grabbing a pop. I figured we’d probably stop to grab some food while we were in the suburbs of Emporia, so I was going to wait. I hate warm pop.
I was scanning the parking lot. It’s a habit my wife has learned to tolerate over the years. She still gets annoyed that I can have conversations with some of my friends and never make eye contact with them, because we’re both too busy scanning the area for threats. As long as I can remember, I’ve lived in what I later learned was called “Condition Yellow.â€
Colonel Jeff Cooper, US Marines, had come up with what later became known as the “Cooper Colors†decades before I read about them. The theory is that our awareness is in varying states, depicted by the colors white, yellow, red, and black. White is something akin to a complete oblivion to your surroundings. Most people are like that when they’re either asleep or watching television. You just kind of let your mind wander. Yellow is a somewhat heightened awareness. You still concentrate on the task at hand, but you’re also aware of your surroundings. Red is when you’re concentrating solely on the task at hand. It’s often characterized by being incompletely aware of your surroundings. You generally get this in situations of extreme stress—car accidents, self-defense shootings. Things like that get you tunnel vision and compromised fine motor skills. Condition Black is when your mind is overloaded and nothing works right. In the words of a pot-bellied instructor I once had in the Air Force, it’s when “you need to take a tactical timeout.†But I digress.
I was vaguely aware of the fact that I was the only person at the pumps at that time. No other cars in the pump area and just a couple of cars in front of the store. Everyone was inside. Not even a lot of traffic on the road near the station. It was late summer, so I was dressed in khaki shorts, one of my Under Armor polos, with my Woolrich vest. Tucked away near my strong hand side hip was my Springfield XD45. I’ve carried that gun whenever I could for the last eight years. The vest was designed to conceal the fact I was carrying it. It came in handy, because I could carry my cell phone, a flashlight, and an extra magazine in the vest. It was comfortable, and many people who don’t carry a concealed weapon just wonder whether your fashion sense is a bit out of whack. For gun people, it was a great conversation starter.
I registered the fact that a somewhat disheveled man in his mid- to late-thirties was kind of shuffling toward me. He was about 80 yards away when I noticed him. His clothes were a bit ragged and he seemed to have a bad limp. Clubfoot or badly healed broken bone in his lower left leg, I guessed. White male, messy salt-and-pepper hair, flannel shirt, gray t-shirt, jeans, white sneakers. It aggravated my wife how I could get all of that from a single glance.
He also seemed to have something wrong with his face. His lower lip was bloody, like he’d been belted on the jaw in a fight. I didn’t know what was wrong with him, but the short hairs on the back of my neck stood up. Well, they would have, had I not shaved them off that morning. I had gone with the bald look about nine or ten years before. I shifted my stance so that I was a little more square with this guy, shifting into a heightened state of Condition Yellow. My hands went to my hips, my right hand ready to sweep the vest out of my way to execute my draw.
He was about 40 yards away now. Still shambling toward me. He let out a guttural moan. That kind of freaked me out. I mean, c’mon, a moan? It was like a bad horror movie or something.
“Sir,†it never hurt to be polite, “are you alright?†He didn’t answer, just kind of grunted. “Sir, I want you to stop right where you are.†My hand moved to my gun, and I checked the area behind him to make sure of my backstop. His hands went out in front of him like a bad parody of Frankenstein. Another moan. This one was deeper. Louder. I glanced behind me and saw Amy and the boys coming out of the store. I checked his position. Thirty yards, still moving slowly.
“Amy, keep the kids inside the store until I come and get you!†“What? Why?†“Dammit, don’t argue with me. Get back in the store and get out your cell phone! Call 911!â€
I saw her hustle the kids back inside. I turned to the man. Twenty yards. I put my weak hand in front of me, tightened my grip on the gun.
“Sir, I’m warning you, don’t come any closer. I want you to turn around and walk away.â€
Absolutely no response. I’d never seen anything like this before. Not even in the movies. Kept right on coming with that slow shuffle. The gas pump clicked off. A car slowed in the drive into the gas station. Fifteen yards.
I drew the gun and put my weak hand on my strong hand, getting my grip. I was in high-ready, looking over the sights at my target.
“SIR, IF YOU DON’T STOP RIGHT FUCKING NOW, I WILL SHOOT YOU!†I don’t cuss a lot. When I do, people usually realize I’m serious. Ten yards.
“MOTHERFUCKER, FREEZE!†Five yards.
It’s funny, the things that flash through your mind when you’re under stress. I was fast approaching Condition Red. In my mind, I heard my friend Candace telling me a story about her father the cop. When the gun comes out, negotiation is over.
The gun moved up just an inch or so. I made the triangle with my SureSights and put the tip over the center of his chest and squeezed the trigger twice at three yards. To this day, I don’t remember hearing either shot. The man stumbled backward and fell onto his backside. I knew both shots hit him in the middle of his chest. I brought the gun down just a hair. The car that had pulled into the lot panic-stopped and a man got out.
I threw my support hand out in his direction, while I watched the man I’d just killed.
“Sir, please call the police and tell them there’s been a self-defense situation.†I began to rehearse what I needed to do when they arrived. I’d read a lot of Massad Ayoob’s columns and had seen him on TV. I needed to keep people out of the scene, call my lawyer, preserve evidence, and keep my family safe.
A woman screamed. I looked back at the body.
The man I’d just shot got back up and started toward me again, mouth open, eyes blank, moaning for all he was worth. He was also not bleeding. I could see the holes in his shirt. I could see the holes in his chest. He should have lost about a third of his total blood volume by this point. The holes were right through the sternum, about an inch apart. Guess I rushed the second shot.
He started to grab for my arm. I felt his grip. His fingers were ice cold. And he seemed intent on drawing my arm toward his mouth.
Well, I sure as hell wasn’t going to let him bite me, so I let him have rounds three and four out of my magazine. This time I aimed for his head.
Both rounds exited with a spray of brownish liquid and chunks of skull and brain. He collapsed like a puppet whose strings had been cut. I noticed there was no blood. Brownish-black ooze, brain matter, bits of skull. No blood.
Weird. A siren in the distance tore my eyes away from the corpse. Two cop cars. Great. Felony response. This should be fun.
Two Hours Later, Emporia Police Department Headquarters, Emporia, Kansas
“Mind telling me why you shot the guy?â€
Again. I’d been over this with the cop for more than an hour.
“Look,†I said, “I told you this three times already. The guy was acting weird. He kept coming toward me after I told him to stop. He kept coming after I drew my gun. He was moaning at me. I had no idea what his intentions were.â€
“So you had to shoot him?†The cop was in his late 40s. Off-the-rack JC Penney’s shirts, lots of polyester. Balding, pot belly. Coffee stain on his shirt. Stained teeth. Brown fingers from too many cigarettes.
“Yeah. I did. I felt I was in danger, man. He didn’t respond like people normally do when you draw down on them. He looked like he had been in a fight or something. His behavior was way out of norms, so I drew down on him. He kept coming. He was inside of seven yards when I shot him the first time. Then he got up. He was an imminent threat to me.â€
“So why didn’t you run?â€
“I don’t have to, first of all. Second, I didn’t have any place to run to. I was between my car and the pump. I was blocked in. By the time I turned and ran, he could have been on top of me.â€
“But you said that he, what was that word? ‘Shuffled’ toward you.â€
“How long you been a cop?â€
“Fifteen years.â€
“In fifteen years, you’ve never seen a guy who wasn’t moving so great suddenly attack when he had the advantage?â€
He gave me a dirty look. I knew they didn’t have anything to hold me. They were trying to get me to crack. This was a clean shoot. I gave the guy more than ample opportunity to get away from me. I warned him multiple times. The convenience store footage bore that out.
“You going to cut me loose or what?â€
Another dirty look.
“Gotta talk to the DA. Sit tight.â€
With a grunt, he heaved himself to his feet and walked out the door. As I waited, I thought about the shooting. It was weird, just like the story Lee had told me at the match. The guy tried to bite me, John tried to bite someone. Were these things related? Why no blood? How did he get up from the pavement after I put two 230-grain slugs into his chest? What the hell was the brown stuff that came out of his head? What was the deal with his mouth? Why was he moaning? Lots of questions ran through my mind. I didn’t have answers for any of them. Yet. I was going to do my damnedest to find some, though.
About fifteen minutes later, the detective and a short, skinny guy in a bad suit walked in the door. He had “public defender†written all over him.
“Sorry, not interested in legal advice. I have a lawyer. I don’t need you.â€
“Sir, you need legal representation. I’m from the . . .â€
“Public Defender’s Office,†I finished for him. “Yeah, I know. Still not interested. I decide I need a lawyer, I’ll call mine. You may go now.â€
His shoulders slumped. He gave the detective a look, and walked out the door. “That was stupid, Mac. You’re gonna need his help.â€
“Upgraded to giving legal advice, did you? Like I said, I’ve got a lawyer. I need her, I’ll call her. You talk to the DA yet?â€
“Yeah, he’s still lookin’ at stuff. It’ll be awhile. Want anything?â€
“Nope. I’ll wait. Tell my wife to get us a room. I’ll see her in a couple of hours.â€
“You seem pretty sure of that.â€
“Yeah, I am. You know it was a righteous shoot.†I pointed at the one-way glass. “He knows it was a righteous shoot. You’re just going through the motions. You might mention to him that I know Mas Ayoob. I need him, I’ll call him. Your DA doesn’t want to face him in court.â€
He paled a bit. Massad Ayoob was one of the best defense witnesses in the country, when self-defense shootings were the subject. I had met him. I didn’t know him. I wasn’t completely convinced he would take the case, but I was reasonably sure he would. If nothing else, it would be interesting to him.
“I’ll be back.â€
“OK, Ahnuld.†I grinned at him.
He gave me a sour look and walked out the door.
Thirty minutes later, he walked back in. A tall fat guy with slicked back hair walked in a few steps behind him.
“Sir, I’m Jack Larson, the Assistant DA. We’re letting you go. We haven’t completed the formal inquest, so make sure you leave your address and phone number with us.â€
“Can I have my pistol back?â€
“We should impound it as evidence, but we won’t. What we’ve seen so far, coupled with your service record, makes us believe that you’re not a threat to society.â€
I hid an inward smile. I had had a pretty decent security clearance when I was on active duty. I was in intelligence. I no longer had access to classified material, but still had the clearance. They screen pretty well for those. There were no blemishes in my past. Certainly nothing to make people believe I was a threat to them.
I looked at the detective. “Told you.†I grinned at him.
He gave me a glare. “You better not get in any more trouble in Emporia, tough guy. We’ll be watching you.â€
“Watch away, tough guy. I didn’t do anything wrong. I’ll be leaving in the morning.â€
Thirty minutes later, I was walking out of the police station with my gun on my hip. I got into the truck, drove to the hotel where we’d spend the night. I laid awake for the better part of two hours replaying the shooting in my mind.
Couldn’t get past the fact that there was no blood.
Righteous shoot, D.A. backed down all in one day.! Got More along this line?
Comment by Mac on March 17, 2010 @ 1:36 pm
I actually have a whole book, trying to see whether it generates any interest.
Comment by frag316 on March 17, 2010 @ 5:53 pm
It certainly did, the story was very interesting. Nice perspective with the former intelligence community type of guy. would love to read more.
Comment by Kev on March 17, 2010 @ 9:14 pm
There’s interest! I do so enjoy logic and calculation in the living; it’s the opposite from the dead things hunting them! =D
Please continue this work!
Comment by Christine on March 17, 2010 @ 9:31 pm
I think this certainly a well written piece, however I guessed by the name ‘Excerpt’ that it was part of a larger story and such I’m not sure it works too well as a story on its own, its novel paced rather than short story paced in my opinion. However I am quite prepared to accept that my problem with it may be due to the fact I find it difficult to believe that someone could be shot in such a way (my first thought was what if the person was Deaf & ill rather than a Z?), and then be let off scott free. Also surely forensics would show him as Dead before he was shot (but I guess that comes later).
This may well be a cultural thing rather than anything else because if that had been the UK (where I’m from) then the CCTV’s would pick it up, then the CO19 would turn up (UK armed Police), they would have shot a random bypasser by accident, then whilst on remand the papers would have got hold of it proclaiming “Crazed gunman shootout at Service Station” and he would be portrayed as a mad ex-cop bent on revenge on a society gone soft. Cue Public Outrage and a lynch mob, expensive Prosecution Case, man sent down for murder, gets out after 6 months, sells his story to The Sun, retires fat and happy to the Caribbean.
I guess that wouldn’t make such a good Zombie Story.
A Vive la cultural difference!
I’m being facetious. I did think it was well written and I would be interested in reading the whole story, as from that piece, to me, the Ex cop seems a bit superhuman and needs a bit more character. However again I guess this comes later in the tale.
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 2:18 am
Pete, you’re right–it’s part of a larger tale. This is about 10 or so pages (of 287) into the story (it’s around 89,000 words). I’m looking at getting it published, but not sure how to go about doing that.
Comment by frag316 on March 18, 2010 @ 3:01 am
That sounded more harsh than it meant to, and I can’t really talk as my stories tend to stretch the idea of ‘short’ stories to its absolute limit. Novellas may be more appropriate.
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 3:25 am
Well if you find out let me know! I’m two or three stories short of an anthology (actually that makes me sound like a madmen “2 sandwiches short of a picnic” if you get my meaning), and I’m having some artwork done for the cover. I think I may throw it at a few publishers and see what happens and there’s always lulu.com as a last resort, however there are thousands of Zombie books on there, with a massive variance in quality.
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 3:57 am
Pete,
Not at all! I welcome the commentary. Later in the story, I surmise the police were leaned on to let me go. The idea being the government knows what’s going on and wants to keep it quiet for as long as they can.
I’d like to avoid lulu.com, as I’m sure you’re right about the variance in quality and the number of books. I’d like to have Max Brooks leaf thru the manuscript and put his stamp of approval on it as part of the larger WWZ enterprise.
I wrote this while I was deployed to Iraq in 2007, and didn’t feel the need to change it despite the fact that I deployed to Afghanistan in 2009 in a ground combat unit and got to go outside the wire (I’m sitting in Manas, Kyrgyzstan as I write these comments). I’m working on another book (not zombies this time), trying to wrap my arms around the concept.
Comment by frag316 on March 18, 2010 @ 4:51 am
Pete,
Sorry for the double, but I’ve also enjoyed your stories very much!
Comment by frag316 on March 18, 2010 @ 4:53 am
Thank you.
As for the Police letting the protagonist go so quickly, I guess that the problem with posting an excerpt. Its slightly out of context.
I assumed that you were writing these comments in the US, and was wondering what you were doing up so early/late?
Also, although I am not a supporter of the reasons for going to War I feel it is important we (US/UK in particular) finish the job we started. I would just like to praise you for doing the job you do out there, I certainly couldn’t do it.
Now we’ve stopped blowing each other I must get on and do some (slightly less important) work!
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 5:40 am
Good story. I am very interseted in reading more, but seeing as you are trying to get this published I doubt that you will post the rest?
Either way, it’s been a good week for the website. Three new (quality) stories in less then a week!
Comment by sdot on March 18, 2010 @ 5:52 am
Hi Kent,
You should try looking at the newest Writer’s Market publication for 2010. My wife is a composition professor, and she gets one every year to look for venues for publication. I just flipped through it, and there is a pretty comprehensive listing for horror publishers. Good luck, and I hope to see more of your work!
Comment by Drew Fuller on March 18, 2010 @ 7:12 am
Drew,
Is that just US publishers or UK as well?
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 7:57 am
ahh its ok. I’ve found the UK 2010 version
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 8:06 am
TOWWZ is like buses, nothing for ages then three come along at once 😉
Comment by Pete Bevan on March 18, 2010 @ 8:12 am
Don’t bother with Writer’s Market, it’s 3 months out of date (or worse) when it goes to print and their online presence is woeful. There are several good listing sites online, a short google search with turn up many geared specifically towards horror. Start with http://www.ralan.com, also check http://www.duotrope.com, also check the listings at Preditors and Editors for it agents and publishers with a good record of dealing with a writer. http://pred-ed.com/pubagent.htm. Take some time and learn how to write a query letter, and maintain a submissions log.
Good luck and welcome to the competition. Start growing your rhino hide now, you’ll need it. Finally, now that this book is done, spend an hour or two a week on market research for it, and use the rest of your writing time authoring a new book.
Comment by jrderego on March 18, 2010 @ 10:10 am
http://www.agentquery.com/ is an excellent resource for finding representation, complete with the ability to sort and filter by genre.
Comment by admin on March 18, 2010 @ 10:26 am
This story was solidly delivered.
As for being a writer, Google “How I Make A Living Writing Full Time Brian Keene” for a pull-no-punches rundown on how it works.
Generally, professional writers say never ever self publish, but that is changing somewhat. However, professional writers have an established audience already in place if they do decide to do it.
Keep up the good work.
Comment by Wrenage on March 18, 2010 @ 11:40 am
Thanks to jrderego and admin for all of the resources and ideas. What a great place to share and network.
Comment by Drew Fuller on March 18, 2010 @ 12:16 pm
I would buy the book today and pass the word to others.
Comment by Dallas on March 18, 2010 @ 12:39 pm
interesting please submit more
Comment by uncleb on March 18, 2010 @ 5:05 pm
I liked this as a long blurb about a book. I look forward to reading the rest of the story.
Liked the physical description of the “dead” Zombie. It seemed fairly thought out. I also liked the self-criticism about the quality of his shooting. That really brought a touch of the real to it for me. That internal monologue that we all go through, every time we do something.
Comment by cdugger on March 18, 2010 @ 7:11 pm
I like the style, very dry, terse, focused- tells a lot about the character. This definitely has the potential for a book- particularly since your character seems to be someone who’d think about fields of fire, proper physical obstacles and all those other practical aspects of z killing.
I’m not sure I agree with shooting the Z- without knowing that zombies exist, backing away, running away seem more plausible to me- but you made it work for the character. It raises a good point.
Most of the second wave of zombie kills probably were the idealistic “here let me help you”, too-altruistic-for-their-own-good people who could have leavened the mix of survivors, moderated the actions of the “my personal survival at all cost” crowd. So many of the Z movies you see the group of survivors as, basically, idiots or at least unconcerned about anyone but themselves. Where’s Jimmy Stewart to hold up his hands and say “Now just wait a minute folks, we’ve got to hang together here”? He got bitten on the second day when he ran to help a bloody, staggering ten year old who turned out to be a zombie.
Comment by T.J. McFadden on March 19, 2010 @ 8:12 am
aside from the story itself (which was enjoyable) I like the ayoob and jeff cooper references. good people, both of them.
Comment by Tim on March 19, 2010 @ 10:22 am
Enjoyable, but it seems like the main character just seems so perfectly prepared, and quick witted, and well trained. All the pieces seemed to fall into place a little too perfectly. I’ve read other stories that play like this. Their enjoyable, and often informative but seem like a survivalist wish list. Soften up the character a little, make him a little easier to identify with maybe. Just my two cents though sir. Like I said first though, enjoyable, really.
Comment by Scooter on March 19, 2010 @ 2:39 pm
MOAR!
Comment by Justin on March 21, 2010 @ 8:14 pm
Just killer, keep it up.
Comment by Joe from Philly on March 22, 2010 @ 10:29 am
I really enjoyed the story. I especially liked your position that people within the conceal-and-carry/gun crowd are often more concerned with functionality of clothing than style, or maybe my wife is right and I just have no taste in fashion. Whatever, thank you for your service and stories. Would love to read more.
Comment by Chris on March 22, 2010 @ 1:31 pm
Really enjoyed this. I like the tales that start off with people not knowing what is going on and trying to work it out, whilst I’m screaming at them shoot it in the head! Also nice to see Kansas used as a setting. I have spent some time out there (Manhattan and Selina) and would love to know if you rest of the story is set there as well so I can tell my friends to move back to the UK quckly 🙂
Comment by Nick Lloyd on March 23, 2010 @ 3:57 am
Very well done! I’d definitely be interested in reading the entire story. Keep up the good work here and abroad!
Comment by kineo on March 23, 2010 @ 5:49 pm
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nice work. its nice to see someone writing that knows something about guns. i own a xd 45 service and xdm 9mm. i love them both. i imagine you might also. so props on the shout out to the xd. i get sick of reading zombie stories where they know nothing about guns. 95% of the time they call magazines clips and that annoys me. thats what gang bangers call them and people who dont know anything about guns. anyways, good story, would like to read some more.
Comment by jeff on March 24, 2010 @ 12:36 pm
Bravo. Would love to see more. Obvious tactical knowledge…since your probably off in some mountain right now you know what your doing! Lots of publishers. I’ve read a lot of this stuff and your’s matches up well even for just an excerpt. Hope I see it somewhere some day so I can pick it up.
JP
Comment by JACKPOT on March 26, 2010 @ 2:06 pm
“Unintended Consequences” with zombies. I’d buy it. Make sure it doesn’t looking like another Patient Zero though.
Comment by GB on April 5, 2010 @ 1:55 pm
I enjoyed this story very much. You can tell it’s part of a much bigger story and I’d love to read it in full! Nice detail and background! Love the Copper Colors reference! Can’t wait to read more!!
Comment by Jen on April 7, 2010 @ 5:59 pm
Ok, so first. I enjoyed it. I guessed it was part of a larger story so read it as such.
However, I felt the main character was too 2D. While I did enjoy the technical aspect, and the descriptive parts are fantastic. As a service personnel myself I can see how you’ve drawn on your own experiences and training to write the character. And it well and truly works, however I did feel he was very lacking. Where were his feelings? When you put a round in another man you don’t just take that on the chin.
Mind, it’s only an excerpt so I can’t reflect this onto the rest. Should you get it published I will eagerly buy this. Your experiences make this a good and ‘authentic’ read. It’s nice to see some techincal and tactical information there for once as opposed just, he fired the gun.
Great work.
Comment by Scott B on May 9, 2010 @ 2:14 am
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Kent – interesting, left me wanting to read more!! Hope you and yours are doing well!!
Bill (previously of 820th and NSW)
Comment by Bill Wilson on September 19, 2011 @ 2:54 pm
Thanks, Bill! Long time no hear! Shoot me an e-mail at kent.christen@ustranscom.mil.
Comment by Kent Christen on September 20, 2011 @ 8:44 pm